Kissi se Kehna Mat

I was in a family get-together when I received a call from Accenture. Accenture is a Multinational Software Company, which means it has offices in various countries of the world.

The girl from the other side of the phone probably rolled her tongue to create an alien accent.
She said " Hi, This is Sujata calling from Accenture Corporate Office Mumbai. It is to inform you that you have been selected as a Senior Software Engineer. Rest of the details will be emailed to you shortly. Thanks. Have a nice day."

Though it was hard to understand her language in "pretended to be like an American accent", I managed to grab the abstract of it.
I got a job in Accenture. I couldn't resist my exhilaration that I informed my father.

I said with excitement " Papa, I got the job in Accenture. Just now, they called me."
Papa with equal intensity reverted " Oh that's good news. Isn't Accenture a bigger company? Will you get more package here?"
I joyfully answered his queries" Yes, its one of the biggest in its working domain and my package will also be 7.5 lakhs/annum. But don't disclose this news to anyone, Papa because I want to be sure of my offer letter, joining location and other important details. This may take few days. I am anyway going to Bangalore and return directly to Sunny's marriage after 5 days. We will then inform everyone. What do you say?"
He said with agreement" No, we will even inform after you join the company. All the best."

As I left, a lot of  bilateral consensus happened between people, which are as follows.

Consensus 1:- My father said to my mother" Ravi got a new job in Mumbai. The company has offices abroad as well. Please don't disclose it to anyone now."
For my mother, the job location matters more than the company and its offered salary. She has an impression that every software engineer goes abroad and settles down there, which is true to some extent. 

Consensus 2:- My mother shared her mixed feeling with my Mausi(her sister) " Ravi got senior position in Mumbai and after few months, he will also go abroad like everyone. Don't reveal it now to anyone."
For my Mausi, senior position only means more money. 

Consensus 3:- My Mausi discussed it with his son (my II cousin) " Ravi became senior and soon going to abroad."
My cousin made some calculations in his mind and clarified my Mausi's doubts " Accenture sends his people to Europe. For a Senior Software Engineer, they offer around 5000 Euros per month. That means 4 lakhs per month."
My Mausi almost fainted after hearing that.      

Consensus 4:-  My cousin continued to disclose to my I cousin " Did you get to know about Ravi? He is going to Europe and will be earning 4 lakhs per month. Fod diya bande ne (He progressed incredibly). 
My I cousin replied " No I wasn't aware of this. But sounds great."
My II cousin " In that case, please don't say that I told you. "

My II cousin extended this to his father.

Consensus 5:- His father (my uncle) told his wife (my aunt) " Ravi is going abroad. He will settle down there after his marriage. MK (my father) has one daughter and one son. The daughter will go her home after marriage and the son will settle down abroad. Why to have kids then if they don't live with you? Anyway, they have not informed us so you also don't share it with anyone."

Actually, the marriage of neither my sister nor mine were fixed at that point of time. 

Cycling Chain:- The message was spread in the entire family, friends, neighbors and their friends in just 5 days.

I attended my cousin's marriage after my return from Bangalore. I was unaware of what happened when I was not around.

I was looking for my friend then suddenly Mr. Gupta (our neighbor) patted my shoulder very hardly " Oh congratulations Ravi ! Naam roshan kar diya bhai ( You made everyone proud)"
Soon Mr. Saini (my father's colleague) also joined us.
"Did you hear that Saini ji? Ravi is going abroad. You know, the money we earn in a year, he will earn in a month there." Mr Gupta continued with laughter.

Was it funny that Mr. Gupta and Mr. Saini couldn't resist their laughter? Oh, my poor sense of humor that I could not sense the joke. But I didn't understand where his story came from till I realized that it was not only his contribution, but the entire family and friends to create a marvelous fictional story about my job.

I pissed off in the beginning but then couldn't resist laughing after tracing the whole chain of consensus back. It was fun. Indeed, our social networking is better than Facebook :)